COACHING
CONCEPTS
Bragging Rights
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When we attend weddings, I always write on the card to the bride and groom:
Remember the 3 "Cs" of Marriage
COMMITMENT
COMPROMISE
COMMUNICATION
Just the other night, I said to Keith, “Maybe we ought to renew our wedding vows some time.” (I was actually being kind of facetious) And he came back with , “Why, I already said it once!” He’s been known to say more than once, “When I said it, I meant it.” That’s the commitment I’m talking about. Now it may not sound that romantic to some of you, but I don’t think that commitment is necessarily about romance. Romance is about candle light dinners, walks on the beach at sun rise or in the moonlight, rose petals in your bed and on and on. I think you get what I mean. Commitment is the stake you put in the ground and build everything else around it. Without commitment, you can just walk away which is much of the problem with so many relationships of any kind today.
Think of a time when you made a compromise? Think about how it made you feel. Interestingly enough, I just pulled my Webster Dictionary from the shelf to find the definition. I would have to say that normally I would think of a compromise as being one sided. For instance, when one person declines their dream job, in order to allow their partner to finish school. Or, when someone agrees to move to another community in order for their spouse to take a promotion. Maybe it’s even a matter of giving up a job in order to stay home with your children. However, the definition in the dictionary says, “a mutual promise, a settlement in which each side gives up some demands or makes concessions.” Either way, it takes a lot of work , love, commitment and communication.
Speaking of communicating, I believe that it is one of the most difficult
parts of any relationship. You simply can’t have enough. In the
world of marketing, it’s said that in order to make sure that people
actually receive a message, you have to communicate it at least eight
times. In marriage, I’m pretty sure you can at least double that.
There is so much opportunity for misunderstanding. You constantly have
to clarify. You also have to be careful not to make assumptions, which
is so easy to do when you’ve been together 5, 10, 15+ years. My
best advice is communicate, communicate, communicate!
I would challenge each of you to focus on these three C’s within
one of your relationships over the next month.
Commitment:
- Write down and review all of the reasons you made the commitment in the first place.
- Write a list of the things you're grateful for in the relationship and share them with your partner.
- Think about what compromises that you’ve made and how they made you feel. Maybe consider sharing that with the other party involved.
- Think about what compromises you’d be willing to make and what ones you wouldn’t.
- Thank someone who has made a compromise for you.
- To steal a slogan from Nike: “JUST DO IT”
- Make time to talk things out.
- Use a variety of communication (ie: voice messages, e-mails, cards, letters, etc.)
- If necessary, ask to use the “REWIND” button. This is
when you notice a conversation going south and you ask if you can have
a “rewind”, a chance to start over.
I certainly don’t have all the answers, but I keep working at it. If you’re trying to work through any relationships, using a coach (click here) may be helpful.
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Jo Anne's Journey - 2007
- 17- Reflexology at Marquette Senior
Living Center - 18 & 19 Benevon Training
with the Red Cross
in Baltimore
- 1 – 5: Tampa, FLA
- 12 Lincoln's Birthday
- 14 Inforum Coffee Klatch
Reflexology Presentation - 16 & 17 Reflexology at ReMax in Boyne City, MI
- 22 Washington's Birthday
- 16-19 Traverse City, MI - State Athletic Directors Conference
- 28- April 7 SPRING BREAK!! Hilton Head here we come!
- 29 PCAM Annual Conference
“Coaching Into Greatness”
- Hilton Head, SC through the 7th
- 16 Be Red Cross Ready Breakfast
- 6 Human Resource Association
Michigan State University
The Evolution of HR – panel discussion
- 12 Lansing Area Coaches
Sustaining Your Business
Teleseminar in conjunction
with Leslie Charles - 20 & 21 Across the Curriculum
Summer Institute:
Part I: WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE OF IN YOUR LIFE AND HOW DO YOU NAVIGATE THOSE DIFFICULT CONVERSATIONS IN ORDER TO GET IT
Part II: SELLING YOURSELF AND
ASSESSING OTHERS
(Resume Writing and Interviewing Tips)
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Sports Spouses - The Challenge of Being a Coach's Wife
Being a coach’s wife takes a special person. You automatically become the CEO of your household and family. You are the “glue” that holds it all together. When it’s time to move, you make all the arrangements. When it comes to dealing with the kids issues at school, you deal with the teachers. When it comes to soothing your spouse’s bruised ego after a loss, you’re the one who’s there for them.
When recently working with a group of coaches’ wives and asking the top three to five challenges of being a coach’s wife, the number one reason was loneliness followed by work/life balance, limited family time, lack of communication and dealing with change. Sound familiar?
Being a coach’s wife may be fulfilling enough for some women, but not for others. That certainly doesn’t mean that they don’t love their husbands or that they’re not supportive. It may just mean that they also need to be fulfilled as a person themselves. By working with a coach, women would have an opportunity to find out what it is that fulfills them. In addition, they can share experiences and build camaraderie.
Coaching is an opportunity for the wives to identify their own goals and issues, develop a plan for obtaining them and be held accountable.
For more information, log on to www.riseandshinetoday.com (Group Coaching) or contact Jo Anne Froelich, Personal and Professional Coach at 517-202-0553.
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If you're the spouse of a coach of one of the following sports, please click on the appropriate picture:
directors
Rise and Shine Today monthly newsletter - june 2006
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